On Horrifying Things That I Hope To Never Encounter

In which we belittle a sovereign nation and visual imagery is utilized.

I am on vacation this week in Maine and I had wanted to do a series of posts about the things I am doing and seeing. As I went along I was going to post pictures and humorous stories and situations. In short it was going to be pretty awesome. Unfortunately I left the cable for my camera at home so I can't upload my pictures, which steals my thunder for the posts. So you will have to wait for an after action report about vacation next week.

So instead we are going to talk about something horrible. Mind bogglingly horrible. Imagine if you will that you are a rancher who works with cattle. Cows are your life blood and main source of income. As you can imagine a large part of your job is travel around and muster your livestock. But here's the thing, you have a lot of land and a ton of cows so you have to use a helicopter to see all your animals. So there you are hovering over your cows when you see something off in the distance, a cow is on it's side and something is eating it. Something is eating one of your cows. Is it Bigfoot? Is it a velociraptor? Is it Jared pre-Subway diet? No, unfortunately it is none of these things. What is it you ask? Here let me show you.

Are you kidding me? Look at this thing! And where you might ask does such a ungodly animal exist? No not in Columbus, Ohio though that is a good guess. This loathsome beast lived, slaughtered cows, and was shot in Australia. But what do you expect from an island that was used a penal colony for years. I think that mother nature is just trying to drive the white folks out of there with freaky animals.

Now I've never been to Australia so I can't speak with any authority. But I say they pack it in and give the island to the boars. We don't need it. And while we are at it let's build a wall around Georgia and never go back there either. Though in all honesty I could come up with a number of reasons to never go to Georgia again, none of which have anything to do with giant animals.

I suppose that if there was any good to come from this abomination it's that when North Korea eventually leads us to a nuclear apocalypse we can saddle the bad boys up and use them as a means of transportation. I call shotgun!