On Lego

In which we discuss dastardly pirates fighting chivalrous knights, cubic art, and a gift.


Growing up one of my favorite things to do was to build various Lego models.  It was always a tradition that at Christmas I would receive at least one Lego set, I would always shake the present listening for the tell-tale rattle of little plastic blocks that let me know what I was about to open.  Once we were done unwrapping all the presents the next step was to spread out on a coffee table or kitchen table and assemble the newly acquired model. I would work unceasingly until I had finished.  As I got older the models got more and more complex.  There are still a few that I assembled and put on a shelf and it is still there just hanging out.  Most of the Lego sets that I have though eventually were disassembled and put in giant tubs in our basement.  At this point is when creativity would take over.

There were always epic scenes in which pirates battle knights on horseback, racecars zoomed through airports, and space battles between robots, aliens and astronauts.  Most of this nonsense ended in crushing collisions and monstrous explosions.  In short, Micheal Bay would have been proud.  While these my creations were always lots of fun they weren't really creative in the traditional sense, I always had this grand dream to use all my Lego pieces to create something really awesome.  Maybe one day.  But then again, I am not really that artistically creative.  That's not where my creative juices flow you might say.

Some people though, man they do some cool things with Lego sets.  Like this guy (whose Flickr id is balakov) has been recreating classic photographs with Lego pieces.  Here are some examples of his work.

This is a recreation of Charles Ebbets' "Lunch atop a skyscraper" originally taken in 1932, check the original here.

Here is a recreation of Robert Capa's 1944 photograph taken during the D-Day invasion or Normandy beach, the original is here.

This is one most people will recognize, Jeff Widener's 1989 photograph of "The unknown rebel," the original is here.

Pretty impressive, these pictures certainly put my space battles to shame.  But what are you going to do.  In a slightly more functional realm of things a British man named James May designed and constructed a two story house complete with running water and an uncomfortable bed.  Unfortunately for Mr. May his house leaks, the land he built it on wants it gone, and no one seems to want or is able to take it.  An article, that you can read here, said that if it wasn't taken it was going to be destroyed.

Since this article was written back in September I am guessing that any chance for you to visit and/or own this giant eyesore was likely destroyed with chainsaws...lets leave Mr. May alone to ponder his future.

Not to be outdone in the creative realm of artistic Lego sets the Lego company began an Architecture line of Lego sets.  Taking famous architectural landmarks and building them out of little plastic squares.

While most kids would be terribly disappointed by the lack of fantastical objects found within the box I for one think that the Lego version of Frank Lloyd Wright's Falling Water is pretty amazing.  So if you have a hundred bucks laying around and you are feeling generous you could totally buy it for me.  I will be your best friend forever.  I promise.

Don't forget: the plural of Lego is Lego.

On Random Thoughts

In which we quickly jump from topic to topic, and footnotes are used for the first time.

The key when eating a foot-long sub from Subway, much like eating Chinese food, is to wait a few minutes between the first half and the second. You aren't as hungry as you think, and if you finish it all now you will feel terrible and not have dinner ready made later on.


Note to self:  Before feeling concerned for the safety of a child presumably trapped in a runaway, homemade balloon check for the following warning signs that everything is not all that it seems. 1) The parents are nutty storm chasers who were on a reality TV show⁽¹⁾.  2) The aforementioned nutty parents named their child "Falcon."  3) Said parents also contacted new stations about their missing sun prior to contacting the police.  If one or more of these conditions apply the child is most likely safe in the attic and the parent may or may not be a d-bag⁽²⁾ who put his kid up to it for publicity purposes.


I am terribly excited for the new movie Where the Wild Things Are.  It is the first movie in many months that I would be fine seeing opening weekend and not waiting for it to be a Five Buck Club movie.  If you haven't seen the trailer yet here it is for your enjoyment.  Just watching the trailer makes me feel like a kid again, I can't wait to see this movie.


One movie that I will absolutely see opening night, and will drag along as many people as I am able, is The Road staring Vigo Mortensen.  It is based on Cormac McCarthy's book by the same title.  The book is beautiful and dark and hopeful and deserves much more than I can say in a simple paragraph so we will come back to it at another time.


If you find yourself ordering clothing online know that REI.com has the fastest turn around that I have seen on their shipping.  I ordered a sweater from them on Tuesday night and it arrived three days later.  Conversely, Amazon's Super Saver shipping is the worst, I've had items coming from Kentucky take 2 weeks to arrive.


At the request of Tim Street I will now talk about Lando Calrissian.  Lando is a good friend to Han Solo and a known scoundrel and all-round ladies man.  He is probably best know as the only black guy in Star Wars and for blowing up an uncompleted Death Star⁽³⁾.  Here is a picture of Lando in Lego form.  Calm under pressure Lando knows that Han will have that shield down, we've just got to give him more time.  Lando is in no way related to Dumbledore Calrissian who needed to return a ring to Mordor.


Sara Zimmer says, "Write about rabies."  Okay.  Rabies, not to be confused with scabies or babies, is a virus that is often carried by wild mammals.  If you have rabies right now you should probably stop reading my blog and go seek medical help, other wise you will probably die.  Apparently there are a number of countries where rabies is no longer present.  One of which is Australia (as well as a lot of Europe) at first this might not seem fair, but those guys have it alot worse...trust me.  Here are some important facts about rabies from Michael Scott, Regional Manager of Dunder Mifflin.

"Myth - three Americans die every year from rabies. Fact - four Americans every year die from rabies. How many of you know someone that has been afflicted or affected by rabies? Show of hands. One, two, three... too many to count. It is truly the silent killer. No, it is the foaming barking killer."

Thanks Michael, that was extremely helpful.  Hope you enjoyed my smattering of topics.  And the footnotes.

Seriously, who wants to see Where the Wild Things Are or The Road with me?
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(1) On the terribly named show "Wife Swap," I swear some TV executives need to be slapped or thrown in jail or both.
(2) If it turns out this was all some elaborate hoax the parents should have to pay back the tax payers money that was wasted chasing that balloon down.  If they can't afford it they should be forced to watch terrible reality TV shows until their eyes fall out.
(3) And he probably killed thousand of private contractors hired to complete the Death Star.  For a discussion on the ethical implications of killing thousands of non-combatants I invite you to watch this clip from the movie Clerks (click here) please note that this clip almost certainly contains vulger language.

On Scramping

In which we make an indelible mark on the English language.

Scramp
\ˈskramp\
Function: verb
Etymology: Modern English; originated by the Guff
Date: 21st Century
1: To purposely foil someone's plans or schemes.
2: To place someone in an untenable position (as it related to the Settlers of Catan).
3: To screw someone over.
- scramper \ˈskram-pər\

Synonyms: scrimp, shrimp, scrimp-scramp, shramp, shrimp-shramp
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It is impossible to spend any time with Will, Colleen, Kevin, Carrie, Tim or I and not here the word 'scramp.' It is our own personal addition to the English language, and we use it, a lot. I think the greatest thing about the word is it's versatility. You can scramp, and thus be a scramper. You can be scramped, and thus be scramped upon. You can be scramped by a person or a situtation. You can scramp a person or an object. It's quite fun. Check this out:

"That scrimp-scramper shramped the last shrimp, I've been scramped upon."

The terminology is seeping into the lexicon of our settlers games, even to those who don't normally join us in shrimping have a tendency to deride any shramping that occurs.. Hopefully the use of scrimps will continue to proliferate throughout the ages. Don't be surprised if one day your kid has to spell "shramp-nar" on a spelling test.

Feel free to try it out in your daily life. Next time you feel like you've been scramped let those shrimp-shramps know it. It will make you feel better, I promise.

Shrimp'in ain't easy.